Trini Kitty Kaos
Trini Kaos is strong but not tough. She hates being told no. She loves to say yes. She’s always in love. She likes scotch or whiskey, listens to fortune cookies, and collects books indiscriminately. She is a Trinidadian with a temper to match. Some call her pansexual. Some call her queer. She calls herself evenly odd. She feeds on sugar and wishful thinking. She lives in Canada where she works an earnest 24 hr job as a feminist migrant activist and sometimes does burlesque or spoken word on stage—kind of like a superhero with a secret identity. Only not super. Or secret. Chaos tends to be attached to her in a passionate affair.
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knuffelvos:

wear your armor

whether it’s makeup, a band tshirt, your fandom pins, tattoos, jewelry, your favorite ripped pair of jeans, or something no one else can touch or see like your favorite song repeating like a mantra in your head, the sound of your own heartbeat, or the knowledge that you were brave enough to get out of bed today when everything else inside you said “no”

wear your armor and kick ass

❝ 

I’ll never punish my daughter for saying no.

The first time it comes out of her mouth, I’ll smile gleefully. As she repeats “No! No! No!” I’ll laugh, overjoyed. At a young age, she’ll have mastered a wonderful skill. A skill I’m still trying to learn. I know I’ll have to teach her that she has to eat her vegetables, and she has to take a nap. But “No” is not wrong. It is not disobedience.

1. She will know her feelings are valid.
2. She will know that when I no longer guide her, she still has a right to refuse.

The first time a boy pulls her hair after she says no, and the teacher tells her “boys will be boys,” we will go to her together, and explain that my daughter’s body is not a public amenity. That boy isn’t teasing her because he likes her, he is harassing her because it is allowed. I will not reinforce that opinion. If my son can understand that “no means no” so can everyone else’s.

3. She owes no one her silence, her time, or her cooperation.

The first time she tells a teacher, “No, that is wrong,” and proceeds to correct his public school, biased rhetoric, I’ll revel in the fact that she knows her history; that she knows our history. The first time she tells me “No” with the purpose and authority that each adult is entitled, I will stop. I will apologize. I will listen.

4. She is entitled to her feelings and her space. I, even a a parent, have no right to violate them.
5. No one has a right to violate them.

The first time my mother questions why I won’t make her kiss my great aunt at Christmas, I’ll explain that her space isn’t mine to control. That she gains nothing but self doubt when she is forced into unwanted affection. I’ll explain that “no” is a complete sentence. When the rest of my family questions why she is not made to wear a dress to our reunion dinner. I will explain that her expression is her own. It provides no growth to force her into unnecessary and unwanted situation.

6. She is entitled to her expression.

When my daughter leaves my home, and learns that the world is not as open, caring, and supportive as her mother, she will be prepared. She will know that she can return if she wishes, that the real world can wait. She will not want to. She will not need to. I will have prepared her, as much as I can, for a world that will try to push her down at every turn.

7. She is her own person. She is complete as she is.

I will never punish my daughter for saying no. I want “No” to be a familiar friend. I never want her to feel that she cannot say it. She will know how to call on “No” whenever it is needed, or wanted.

— Lessons I Will Teach, Because the World Will Not — Y.S. (via poetryinspiredbyyou)

❝ You have to learn to say no without feeling guilty. Setting boundaries is healthy. You need to learn to respect and take care of yourself.

— (via frowly)

(Source: onlinecounsellingcollege)

ladythestripper:

A SUMMER VARIETY MIX BY WOMEN OF COLOR

LISTEN

New work playlist

(Source: hauntedfountains)

Violent Relationships with Dr. Leelia Franck

(Source: exgynocraticgrrl)

lolcamhs:

feelings:
depressed 

what am i feeling?
if you feel like crap
dealing with depression
 let go of your past.
what is depression?/
depression & cutting
things to do instead of cutting
the cure to sadness! (in under 3 minutes)
things to do when you’re sad 
feel good 101: depression

suicidal

everything
hotlines
FAQ's about suicide
reasons to live
statistics about suicide
suicidal feelings
feeling suicidal?
know someone who’s suicidal?
warning signs
websites you can call

anxious

how to calm yourself down during an anxiety attack
helpful tips
create a mind palace
6 breathing exercises
3 more breathing exercises 

self help

everything
20 self help ideas
for when you’re sad
for when you’re anxious
for when you’re angry
looking for a sign not to kill yourself?
tumblr support

self harm

alternatives 1 2 
think twice before you self harm
vent your thoughts
virtual self harm (trigger warning)

LGBT

gay center
glaad
no h8 
the trevor project

cute ass links

feeling disgruntled?
emergency compliment
make everything okay
vent to strangers
free online therapy
cute animal videos
i don’t even know what to call this
funny posts
A WHOLE LOT OF MOVIES TO WATCH

help other people

win rice for people
click to give free necessities to
autism
breast cancer
hunger
animals

games

stickman
silkweave
250+
do some painting
super mario bros
virtual piano
other music thingy
colour game

the quiet place project

receive instant love
90 seconds relaxation exercise
vent to strangers
know that it will be okay
find some quiet
get rid of unwanted thoughts

lolcamhs:

feelings:

depressed 

what am i feeling?

if you feel like crap

dealing with depression

 let go of your past.

what is depression?/

depression & cutting

things to do instead of cutting

the cure to sadness! (in under 3 minutes)

things to do when you’re sad 

feel good 101: depression

suicidal

everything

hotlines

FAQ's about suicide

reasons to live

statistics about suicide

suicidal feelings

feeling suicidal?

know someone who’s suicidal?

warning signs

websites you can call

anxious

how to calm yourself down during an anxiety attack

helpful tips

create a mind palace

6 breathing exercises

3 more breathing exercises 

self help

everything

20 self help ideas

for when you’re sad

for when you’re anxious

for when you’re angry

looking for a sign not to kill yourself?

tumblr support

self harm

alternatives 1 2 

think twice before you self harm

vent your thoughts

virtual self harm (trigger warning)

LGBT

gay center

glaad

no h8 

the trevor project

cute ass links

feeling disgruntled?

emergency compliment

make everything okay

vent to strangers

free online therapy

cute animal videos

i don’t even know what to call this

funny posts

A WHOLE LOT OF MOVIES TO WATCH

help other people

win rice for people

click to give free necessities to

games

stickman

silkweave

250+

do some painting

super mario bros

virtual piano

other music thingy

colour game

the quiet place project

receive instant love

90 seconds relaxation exercise

vent to strangers

know that it will be okay

find some quiet

get rid of unwanted thoughts

Quaker School Wins Religious Exemption to Exclude Trans Student From Campus Housing

Google Is Offering Free Coding Lessons To Women And Minorities

The 33 Realest Tumblr Posts About Being A Person Of Color

Be a CatchAFyah Contributor

The Tyee – Transit Police Report Riders to Immigration Nearly Every Day

10 Things You Didn't Know About Vibrators

fasttoslow:

This is important

fasttoslow:

This is important

❝ Part of it is probably that it’s easier to hate myself than anyone else. If someone else hurts me or upsets me, it’s so much easier to turn all of my bad feelings inward. That sounds counterintuitive, I know, but think about it this way: if I’m angry at someone else, then I have to use up all kinds of mental and emotional energy being upset with them, plus I have to take all this time explaining to them why what they did hurt me, and on top of that I may not even be in the right anyway. In fact, I’m really bad with conflict, so if I try to argue with someone about who was right and who was wrong in any given situation, I will invariably end up feeling like everything was my fault. So it’s much less complicated to assume that everything bad that happens is because of me, and leave it at that.

If I were a different person, I would probably try to kill the way I feel about myself with drinking or drugs. I would go out and do self-destructive things, I would lose control, I would, for even just a few minutes, feel completely different. But I’m not that type of person – for one thing, I’m terrified of not being in control of myself. For another, I have a kid, which isn’t really conducive to that type of lifestyle. So instead I sit at home and seethe with anger at myself, anger at how stupid I am and anger at my inability to change. I sit and make a list of all the ways that I’m toxic to other people, all the ways that I’m unintentionally hurtful, all the ways that I keep fucking up.

— 

On Self-Loathing | The Belle Jar

This is my life.

(via brutereason)

apocweaver:

"In the beginning, all women had to prove that we could be equal to men in armed struggle. So we wanted to be like men - even in our appearance… I no longer think it’s necessary to prove ourselves as women by imitating men. I have learned that a woman can be a fighter, a freedom fighter, a political activist, and that she can fall in love, and be loved, she can be married, have children, be a mother… Revolution must mean life also; every aspect of life."  Leila Khaled (born 1944)

apocweaver:

"In the beginning, all women had to prove that we could be equal to men in armed struggle. So we wanted to be like men - even in our appearance… I no longer think it’s necessary to prove ourselves as women by imitating men. I have learned that a woman can be a fighter, a freedom fighter, a political activist, and that she can fall in love, and be loved, she can be married, have children, be a mother… Revolution must mean life also; every aspect of life."  Leila Khaled (born 1944)